Fear
by xxVictorious
Summary: Beck Oliver was not easily frightened. That was well known. There were only two experiences that actually made him experience pure terror- and made sure he'd never forget. Also known as, two times Beck almost lost Jade. Jade x Beck. Bade loving of course. Also a little mention of Jade/Cat friendship, Some Cat/Beck friendship, and Beck being comforted by his mom.


**WOW, back with even MORE Bade fanfiction, focused around them and their kiddo.**

 **Just what nobody wants or needs.**

 **Disclaimer: Still don't own it.**

 _Fear_

Beck Oliver was notoriously hard to frighten. Scary movies nor surprises did it for him. Even his frightened acting wasn't entirely believable. No, Beck had never truly experienced fear but twice in his life. Both times, oddly enough, involved Jade.

The first time, he was eighteen years old.

Scoring a role in a movie was going to be important no matter when it happened, but right out of high school? That was completely unheard of, yet, Beck managed it. That morning, when he had been leaving the RV, he noticed Jade seemed a little off, but he had attributed it to adjusting to actually living in the RV rather than just staying over. God, does he kick himself for being so wrong.

He had been in the midst of shooting, and had been given a five-minute break for the first time in the past five hours. When Beck grabbed his phone, he felt his heart actually sink to the bottom of his stomach. 17 text messages, and eight missed calls awaited him.

 _ **[Txt: Cat Valentine]:**_ _Beck?_

 _ **[Txt: Cat Valentine]:**_ _Where are you?_

 _ **[Txt: Cat Valentine]:**_ _It's about Jadey_

 _ **[txt: Andre]**_ _Hey Beck, not sure where you're at, but Cat is freaking out about Jade. Everything alright?_

 _ **[Txt: Tori]**_ _Beck, what's going on with Jade? Cat's a mess_

 _ **[Txt: Mom]**_ _Beck, honey, I know you're on set but call me when you can, okay?_

 _ **[Txt: Mom]**_ _Change of Plans, still call me, but when you get off work, come straight to the hospital okay? St. Michaels._

 _ **[Txt: Mom]**_ _She's going to be fine, just get here after work. Love you baby._

The rest of the messages had the same general content, and had the same distressing effect on Beck. As much as he prided himself on being professional, he didn't think he could focus. Not when he knew Jade was in a hospital for some unknown reason. His heart had started pounding and he wasn't sure how to slow it down. His grip on his phone tightened as he felt his heart do the same.

 _Calm, Beck, Calm._

His hand shaking a little, he approached the director and producer, his bag already slung over her shoulder. "Hey, I was wondering when I'd be done for the day?"

The tall blonde director gave him a once over, before a smile slipped onto her face. "When do you want to be done, pretty boy?" She purred, reaching out to touch his hair.

"Um, my girlfriend, is actually in the hospital, and I really need to go see her so I was hoping-"

"Oh. Right. Well, you're only needed as an extra in these upcoming scenes, so you _could_ leave, but all exposure is good exposure Beck. I don't know if you want to leave these scenes-"

Before she could even finish Beck was backing away. "Thank you so much." He called out practically running out the door.

As he waited for a cab he fired off a few texts, searching desperately for answers.

 _ **[Txt:Mom]:**_ _Where's Jade_

 _[_ _ **Txt: Mom]**_ _Is she okay? What's happening to her?_

 _ **[Txt: Mom]**_ _Someone tell me what's going on._

Once Beck got into the Taxi, he practically threw his phone across the car, resting his face on his upper arm. Once he knew he was on his way he couldn't help it- he actually felt tears starting to well in his eyes. He was shaking beyond his control, to the point he couldn't even breathe properly.

Beck realized, this must be fear. And it wasn't a feeling he could have ever acted out, not without understanding it. Now, though, he was sure he'd never forget.

By the time they reached the Hospital, he nearly tripped at the speed in which he was running through the halls. At the ER reception desk, his knuckles were white from how tightly he was gripping the desk top.

"My girlfriend, Jade West, she was brought in here..hours ago." Beck caught a glimpse of himself in the window reflection, and noticed just how disheveled he was looking.

Before the receptionist could answer, he heard a tiny voice calling his name, followed by the voice of a more mature woman.

"Beck!" Cat Valentine called out, rushing over to him. Before he had a chance to react, her arms were wrapped around him as she started to cry into his flannel. "I'm so glad you're here!"

"She's fine, baby." His mother called out from behind Cat, giving him a side hug around the teenage girl. "She's back in surgery now."

"Surgery?!" Beck squeaked out, his voice not even qualifying to be called a voice at that pitch. "What happened to her?"

Cat looked up at him with chocolate eyes glazed over with tears. "Well, she was gonna come help me with a song, for when I meet with the label next week. And she didn't come over." Cat hiccupped mid sentence. "So I came to the RV, and when I came in, she was just..laying there. She was reaaaally pale, and sweating- and you know Jade doesn't sweat!" Cat choked around a sob that escaped her chest. "And she was crying so much and saying it hurt. She didn't want to come, but then she stood up, and then- then she passed out." Cat explained, with a little shrug. "Your mom and I brought her here and they said her Apparatus was broken."

"Appendix, Cat, her appendix ruptured honey." Elaine Oliver explained, patting Cat gently on the back to soothe her, before directing her attention to Beck. "She's going to be okay." 

Beck's arms wrapped tighter around Cat, his grip tightening around her frail shoulders. "I knew I shouldn't have left this morning. She didn't feel good and I left her and she needed me-"He was borderline hysterical when Elaine placed her hand on his cheek. "Beck. She's going to be fine. This is not your fault. Jade should be out any minute now, completely fine. All we can do now is wait, okay?"

Beck nodded, and followed his mom to some seating on the other end of the waiting room. He let Cat rest her head on his shoulder, and he would occasionally stroke her hair or kiss the crown of her head. If anyone else in the world loved Jade, it was Cat.

After an hour or so more, a nurse came out and called out Jade's name. Beck jumped from the chair, promising Cat he would get her as soon as he could.

"are you her boyfriend?" The nurse asked kindly.

"Yeah, yeah, I am." Beck ran a hand through his hair, trying to at least look presentable.

"She's out of surgery now, you can come on back to sit with her while she wakes up." The nurse nodded for him to follow her. "You don't happen to be Beck, do you?" She inquired as they walked.

"Uh, yeah, I am, why do you..."

"She was asking for you before she went into surgery. She'll be pleased to see you."

"The feeling is mutual," Beck assured, stopping as they reached a recovery room. "Can I go in?"

The chipper nurse nodded, "Yep. We'll be in to check on her soon."

Beck gave her a thankful smile, before slipping into the hospital room. Jade, to his relief, was asleep, though he noticed she was starting to stir.

"Hey, babe." He called out soothingly, sitting on the small chair at her bedside. He took her hand, and gently brought it to his lips for a kiss. "You scared the hell out of me." Beck whispered, to what he thought was her sleeping form. "God I'm so sorry babe-"He felt a weak squeeze of his hand, and he looked up to see Jade staring back at him, blue eyes staring at him.

"You look awful." She rasped out, her throat sore from the surgery.

"You're not looking too hot yourself." Beck teased, kissing her forehead. "You really did scare the hell out of me. Why didn't you tell me you were this sick?"

"You have filming to do. I thought it was really bad cramps." Jade admitted, trying to lift her head from her pillow to look at him. "It wasn't until I was about to go into surgery that I even knew what was going on." Jade looked around, a look of disgust on her face. "God, I hate hospitals. Nothing ever good happens in them."

"I don't think that _nothing_ good happens- "

"Did you say you were scared? I though Beck Oliver didn't get scared."

"yeah, well, apparently we're both full of surprises today."

Jade huffed. "Do you think they'll put my appendix in a jar for me?"

Beck thought the fear of something happening to Jade was going to be the worst he could have ever experienced.

Three years later, at twenty-one, he found out just how wrong he was.

It was Beck who was starting to hate hospitals. Maybe nothing good ever did happen in them, he thought to himself, as he paced the waiting room for what felt like the millionth time.

"I just wish someone would tell me something." Beck practically growled, throwing his third extra-large coffee cup of the past hour away.

"Honey, no matter how many times you walk back and forth, that's not going to make anything happen faster. That's why they made you move away from the door." Elaine Oliver reminded him, patting the seat beside her as a silent suggestion that he sit with her.

Beck sat in the seat beside his mom, his leg bouncing anxiously. "They kicked me out, Mom. Something was wrong with her, or the baby, and they wouldn't tell me what was wrong. "He whispered, looking strictly at his mother. His friends had dispersed, to let him have a while alone with is mother, after they saw the distress he was under. "What if I lose her. Or both of them." Voicing his fears was too much for him to hold in, as he buried his face against her raven hair. He let out a sob that broke his mother's heart.

"Beck, honey, we know Jade. She's a strong girl and- "

"There was so much blood Mom. She was so so _so_ pale. And she could barely keep her eyes open." He told her, his tears pooling on Elaine's shoulder. "And the baby, she wasn't even crying. She was _blue."_ _ **Blue had been his favorite color to associate with Jade, until this very moment.**_ "They kicked me out. They kicked me out, and I may never see either of them alive again." That may be his biggest fear, he realized. Losing not only Jade, but whatever piece of her he had left.

"Oh, Beck." She knew none of her words would make this situation even remotely better. For now, all she could do was hold her own baby, and hope he'd be given the chance to do so too.

"How can I tell Cat?" He whispered aloud, his hand wiping away some of the cascade of tears. "How do I explain to Cat that her best friend is dead."

"She's not dead, Beck. And she won't be. Jade's going to be just fine." Elaine paused, but continued to rake her fingers through Beck's soft hair. "You love her a lot, don't you?" She both asked him and reminded him.

"More than anything." Beck sobbed a little harder, now facing the idea of life without her. "But that's not even enough to help her."

"Well than you know that if she knew you had this little faith in her, that she'd beat your ass, Beck." Elaine reprimanded. "So, you better get your shit together before you see her."

Beck gave a dry laugh, simply shaking his head. "Yeah, I'll remember that."

"And Beck, if something did happen to that baby…" She gently eased into the topic. "She'll need you more than ever."

Beck let out another sob, his hands both holding his head now. He was truly inconsolable. This fear was something Sikowitz never could have induced.

"Beck Oliver?" A masculine voice called out, looking up from a clip board. Beck looked up, eyes rimmed red from the tears. "Can you come with me."

Elaine shot her son a wordless glance, patting his shoulder in encouragement for him to go.

The nurse leads him out of the room before beginning. "She's a feisty one you got there. Gave us quite a scare." He explained, glancing at the room number. "We got the bleeding under control, but we want to keep an eye on her. She's had a couple of transfusions, and she's not at her strongest. But she's going to be just fine. She's been demanding you were brought back for about ten minutes, so we think she's going to recover quickly." The young man opened the door for Beck, which Beck stopped.

"What about.. what about the baby, is she.." He cut himself off before he started crying again.

The nurse offered a genuine smile. "Why don't you go see for yourself."

Beck practically ran into the room, throwing the door open. "Jade." He breathed out, running over to her. Before she could protest, he captured her lips in a deep kiss, hand resting on her cheek. When he pulled back he pushed some hair behind her ear. "Please, god, never do that to me again." He pleaded, kissing her forehead again. "I love you more than anything."

"wow, I should almost bleed out more often if you're going to act like that." She joked weakly. "Kidding. I'm not planning on dying anytime soon." Jade promised, pushing him back a little. "I love you too." She assured him. "But I don't know if you'll love me more than anything for much longer." Jade grabbed his face, and tilted it down to look in the crook of her left arm.

Beck felt the tears coming back, as Jade guided his hand down to the sweet little baby she held. She was so tiny, smaller than he could have imagined. But she was alive, and breathing, and impossibly perfect. "Oh, god, Jade, she's okay." He physically felt a weight lift off his shoulders, as he was assured with his own eyes that both of them were okay.

"She's just fine. A little small. And a little early. But she's okay now." They were both going to glaze over the initial fear for now. They weren't letting that be their focus.

Beck nodded, biting his lip to restrain from crying in relief. And joy. They were all _okay._

"Well do you want to hold her?" Jade offered impatiently. "I have an extra needle in my arm, like a malnourished vampire, and it's not the good pain either."

"Always one with words, babe." As Beck struggled to take his daughter carefully, the magnitude of it all hit him. He and Jade were responsible for this tiny, breakable human. And that was a whole new kind of fear.

 **Well. All my stories end with their baby. Every single one.**

 **I hope you enjoyed! I really had a great time writing this one!**

 **Any requests, as usual, let me know!**


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